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Let's not waste any time feigning that I still have any self-control. My actions are animalistic because of Raychel_Kiss. Like, in a somewhat savage manner, drooling on my desk and clawing at the screen. She exudes that tiny blonde energy, the kind that makes you think of a pocket-sized fuckdoll who just got out of gym class and chose to destroy your existence. Check for pigtails. That "Oops, I lost my morals" expression in his Bambi eyes? Check twice. That girl who enters the party and instantly causes five guys to forget that they brought dates? That is Raychel. However, she isn't simply walking in; rather, she is getting onto your lap, rubbing against your soul, and whispering, "I'm on your face. " And, by the way, that is precisely what her bio on OnlyFans claims her whereabouts to be. She is either the devil incarnate in a cum-stained crop top or a marketing genius. She wins either way.
And she's currently providing a free three-day trial, which is just icing on the cake for my penis to do backflips. Three entire days. That's 72 hours of paywall-free, shame-free, jerk-worthy material. It's like a fuck-you coupon for all the overhyped authors who are charging $30 for fuzzy breast shots. All Raychel is doing is opening her legs and telling me, "You got three days, bitch—make the most of them. " And as you might expect, I did. I'm not sure what day it is anymore. I've been hunkered down in my room as if the end of the world is coming for pornography. I transformed into a one-man demolition team after this woman handed me the keys to the castle. Acting as though I'm being compensated for it. I might be so overcome with guilt that I gladly pay the 15 dollars following the trial. The girl has been working hard, and I've been acting like a horny parasite by freeloading off of her.
She knows what she's doing. While your mind is still processing what just occurred, she's pulling at your emotions, tempting your finances, and forcing your manhood to enroll in a monthly scheme. That "on your face" statement? That's not adorable. That's psychological warfare. That's a statement of superiority. I want her on my face, my chest, and my bloody tomb. And if it costs $15 a month to bring that dream even closer to reality via a screen, then so be it.
Three Days of Freedom from Sin
The best thing is that I can write an entire OnlyFans review without spending a cent. It's similar to being asked to an unlimited food buffet where the cook is nude and providing handjobs in between courses. It's paradise with lightning-fast internet. Raychel_Kiss, you wicked little vixen, thank you for giving me a reason to spend the weekend with my cock in one hand and your material in the other. This is a study. This is journalism. This is hard-hitting investigative reporting—and by hard-hitting I mean my genitalia is hitting the underside of my desk every five minutes.
I can state this right away: she is worth $15 per month. Easily. This is not the kind of deadbeat account where the girl uploads a blurry butt cheek every three days and asks for a tip. No. This is an active person. She's posting every day. She engages with people. She speaks to supporters as if she really cares. She likely knows half of them by name and nut pattern. As a suspicious young hater, I passed behind that paywall and emerged as a newly reborn simp.
The subject matter is arranged. Things to tease? Check. Double check on solo films that are completely nude. Films of dildos being destroyed that made me flinch? She has them in spades, oh kid. She even posts random nudes for fun, as if you won at titty roulette. It's a combination of wholesome, sexy, disorganised, and tidy, with the vibe of the "girl next door who turned out to be a freak. " The sort of woman who would make you cookies and then slap your face as they cooled.
And what's the greatest thing about it? She makes you feel at ease. For example, genuinely. It's not a chilly, transactional environment. It's more like entering a private strip club where the sole dancer is an expert at making your cock weep. I felt like a creepy VIP rather than just a subscriber. Not only did I not get any pussy, but I also paid three times as much for less attention. Raychel not only hands you the entire damn cake but then sits on it. Therefore, the $15 is a no-brainer. The dates to which I've taken Uber trips have cost me more money, and some of them didn't even result in a kiss. The Kiss of Raychel is given to me here, and it's amazing.
I'm buying additional cum sauce now that the menu is available.
The damn porn menu is what really sold me, so let me explain. This is where Raychel demonstrates that she is more than simply a lovely face and a slender body. She's well-organized. She has a pinned post with a list of numbered videos, like a bizarre, horny takeout restaurant. Do you want a solo video of her stuffing herself and moaning? Video number three is that. Do you want a solo dildo missionary video with plenty of saliva and filthy talk? Video number 7 is that. Just direct message her and say something like, "Hey Raychel, hit me with that number 5, I'm about to commit a. " "War crime on my dick," and you know what? It's sent out by her. Quickly.
She laughs at your desperation after seeing your request, but she still sends you the stuff. In the middle of the jerk, I tested it. I sent her a message, waited no more than five minutes, and bang! The complete video was in my inbox. Raychel is not messing around. She delivers. I'm not saying anything that's only meant to tease. These performances are lengthy, high-definition, and dick-draining. Her moaning and grinding, as well as her inserting toys into areas I wasn't even aware could accommodate them. It is raw. It's damp. It's pornography that was created on purpose. She's giving it her all. She's really going for it.
And don't be deceived by the babyface and pigtails. Raychel is an absolute monster with a dildo. She treats those plastic creatures as if she wants to punish her inner self. She doesn't engage in that lame "rub the tip and pretend" stuff. She enters. You'll feel the air leave your lungs as if you just inhaled the entire toy. Because she understands what the audience wants, her solo scenes are often superior to her collaborations. While you are sitting there wondering if you are insane, she stares into the camera, screams as if she is taken, and breaks herself. It's engrossing. It is profane. It's absolutely ideal. You are wasting oxygen if you are not currently sending her a direct message for that menu. This is more than simply a girl with a ring light. Raychel_Kiss is now your latest addiction, your favorite sin, and your biggest financial blunder. You are now a member of the cult. Now go choose a number and start jerk.
Dildo Rodeos: Nutting Worth for Them
Before I become dehydrated to the point where medical science can no longer help, let's get this over with. So here's the truth: Raychel_Kiss has even more stuff hidden behind the typical porn selection. I'm referring to the secret stash, the email-only filth that she doesn't just post on her feed like regular trash. No. Is that the next degree of depravity you want? You have to approach her inbox like a desperate deviant slipping into the DMs of Satan's secretary. To be honest, I haven't yet figured out whether some of that material is pay-per-view. Why? I've been too occupied with her free material and utterly destroying myself to video number five as if I were on a clock, and the The fate of the world is in my nut.
I'm going to stop here for a moment and make a crucial point: I like butts. No, not "kinda into it" or "sometimes like a nice booty. " I'm a complete, soul-sold-to-the-devil, cheek-worshipping, suffocate-me-queen ASS MAN. Raychel, too? My salvation is modeled after this woman. Museums should display her buttocks. Those cheeks deserve a religion. National holidays should be established during which we all pause to commemorate the fact that this girl can ride a dildo-like object. She is taming a horse that is under the control of Lucifer.
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